Eating Desserts First

"Each time I browse through the obituaries and don't find my name there, I feel relieved!" Friends have heard that joke from me umpteen times over, but today when the joke comes to mind, it brings a whole new meaning.

Today is different. My Aunty had passed away. This brings the number of people I love who had passed away this year to four - all of them quite sudden deaths.

Although she had no titles to her name, my Aunt lived a full life. She was a bubbly lass, always caring and reaching out to others. She gave cheerfully, sacrificially, and put others before herself. In church, she would ask how we - myself, my sister and my mother - were doing. Her subtle actions towards me and my family touched me greatly. I write this and vivid memories of her surface in my mind.

I ponder over the death of my three loved ones and make a decision:
Life is short.
Grab every opportunity. Once it passes, it might rarely come again.

Today I ponder over my most recent loss, and suddenly something clicks -
Life is short.
Eat the desserts first.
Enjoy life and everything it brings.

I have to learn to let go of things that don't matter - the anxiousness, the anger and the disapproval of others. I want to live in the present - the here and now; and enjoy it. Only then am I able to unconditionally love someone.

Seriously, in my opinion: in life, nothing much matters except loving myself and others.

Death ends a life, not a relationship. Aunty, David, Frank and Anthony, by dying, you teach me how to live in a whole new way.

And to enjoy my desserts first!